Don’t look, Be found

As a young girl, I’ve always had a love for romance. The perfect love story. Surprisingly enough, the Lion King was my favourite Disney movie ever. But I believe that love is something every one yearns for. In the bible, God saw that Adam was not fit to be alone so He decided to create a woman to be his helpmate (Genesis 2:18). Now for those of us who were raised in the church (or not), we know the story of Adam and Eve. It has everything a typical love story has with a bit of a twist. Adam instantly fell in love with Eve and they were living in perfect harmony. Until Eve was tricked by the serpent and convinced Adam to eat of the tree and all else went downhill from there (read Genesis to get the full story). But even then, God didn’t separate them. And why is that? Because God is love. He enjoys seeing His children happy and walking in the purpose He has set out for them. Even Adam and Eve can’t beat the ultimate love story of all mankind. Jesus Christ dying on the cross BECAUSE He loves us. He’s the Son of God. Don’t you think He had every power and billions of angel armies that could’ve removed him from the cross? Oh believe me He did. But He made that sacrifice out of love. That is what is lacking in today’s generation. This post isn’t a rant about millennial because they hear that enough. But it’s just in general. Society is just about instant gratification and God constantly tells us to not be of this world and kill our “flesh” (Romans 8:13, Romans 8:6, Galatians 5:16, Galatians 5:24). There are so many verses in the Bible that suggests that we need to avoid our desires and continue being in the Spirit and walk with God DAILY. Why you may ask? You wont go down the path that I’ve been on…

Here’s a short part of my life testimony.

Remember when I said I loved romance? It was a serious problem at one point in time (Thank God for growth). Every person that I talked to, or liked, I thought that they were the one. And every time I got disappointed because God was showing me I wasn’t ready. I used to be a very stubborn individual but as my walk with God continued, He humbled me and showed me the power in waiting. One particular “relationship” tore me apart. I was a very lukewarm Christian at that time. I picked and choose what I wanted to obey in the bible. It was to the point where I thought this particular person would change. I would pray and cry, cry and pray that he would change and I was convicted in my heart that he wouldn’t. God was even using people in my life to show me that he wasn’t but I never listened.

I gave up.

I was like ok God, he’s not going to change but I’m still going to be with him. Little did I know, I was losing my self in God to the point where I put him before God. I didn’t pray as much, didn’t go to church, NOTHING. I was even losing my friends. I was putting him before myself. I had my entire life set up after graduation. I was going to live in the same city as him and we would live happily ever after.

I was WRONG.

Not only did we break up, I failed my class that I needed to graduate. That was such a rough time in my life that I cried for a month. Was that enough to get me on track with God like I used to? (This is a rhetorical question) A few months after that, I dived into just a binge of sin. Then I met this other guy (CLEARLY I didn’t learn the first time). He was everything that was on my list. And to top it off, he was a man of God. He actually went to church and wasn’t ‘spiritual’ like the last one. I thought to my self, Yes God finally. God simply laughed at me. Guy #2 is what I would call a tip-toer. He would be in God but next thing, he’s in the club with his boys doing God knows what. But yet here I was, infatuated. At this time, I was slowly getting my walk with God back to normal and eventually reaching a new level. I prayed for him every service because y’know, pray for you husband right? My prayers for him were answered. Except he wasn’t with me. That fire quickly burnt out. I cried. I was so fed up and angry with God. Like why did you send this man my way, being everything that I ever wanted and take him away. God responded that I wasn’t ready. I didn’t surrender my all to Him and the person He has for me, needed me to be 10000000000% committed to be a godly woman.

I stopped praying about my love life after that.

Then October 16 2016 came… (That’s a different story all together)

Needless to say, let God write your love story. He knows all your needs and wants and He’ll give it you, just in a different package. Trusting in God is something a lot of believers struggle with. But once you do, you’ll be the happiest person in the world. I guarantee it.

With love,

N.